horrible

warning: explicit content

isn't it horrible to know that i could...

laugh at the poor
push down the old
steal the basker's hard-earned coins
pretend to be a nun to get some donations
stop in the middle of the traffic when its the red man
eat the whole sample of food istead of a morsel
sit with the only person on the bus when there are seat vacant
dress like the groom on my friend's wedding day
run naked in a conference hall
point my middle finger at people on a bus behind the one i'm riding
pat the heads of the small and handicapped
wank at old ladies
beat the ugly up for no apparent reason
turn off the TV when everyone's watching the climax of a soap opera
scream and shout when people are crying in the cinema
evangelise people in North Korea
taze anybody who has done a good deed
tell my instrument players to go into fits once the conductor raises his baton during a concert
sing church songs in a mosque
throw poker cards all over Jakarta
litter
wear a blonde wig if i top the school for 'o'-levels
flash at lift cameras
eat onions before a date
scratch the blackboard with my long fingernails
make a cartoon of red and blue flashing lights and children to suffer epilepsy
play o-biang songs really loud
act as the ghost on hungry ghost festival
give green packets during chinese new year
buy 10 packs of tic-tac for my friend and watch him get addicted
cheer for the construction workers in my school
imply anti-communist ideals to my china-chinese oral examiner
tilt the logo of Red Swastika School 45 degrees right
stare at the taxi driver with bloodshot eyes
bring a black cat to the vet on Friday the 13th
show my phD as my resume when applying as a crew in Mcdonald's
set my F4 ringtone on the Tokyo Metro
snatch the role of the MP trying to do deeds in front of the television screen
sit on the reserved seat and take out the wok hidden under my shirt
cough continuously in the lift and say "i think i've got it"
name my son Fucki and give him a Chinese name similar to mine
prank call the suicide hotline
revise chapter 19
of bio in a church
put aluminium cans in a recycling bin for paper
order nasi babi
use my whipper mini on examination days
adopt an African-American baby and give him a native traditional name; OJ
give the CEO of Creative an ipod for his birthday
put moth-balls in my friend's toilet bowls
put chilli and pepper in a cake that i bake and expect him to appreciate it
bring my caucasian pal to Geylang to have durian for supper
throw a feast of crabs and then pears for desert
throw a coin in an alley of beggars and watch them fight to the death
throw a coin at him/her whenever him/her starts singing
shave my head and tell everyone i'm britney spears
play crap on the piano and name it as a contemporary piece
wear a 'i hate crocs' t-shirt in a crocs store... and ask for assistance
give my father's number whenever someone asks me for my number
paint the moon red and tell everyone that the revelation has come

disclaimer: contents are entirely fictious and the author is sane.